Epilogue
You know…. I thought this was all a crazy dream, but now I know.... it’s not !!! There’s no way that this is real, it just can’t be, I mean what person gets stuck in a kid’s storybook?! Your probably wondering how this happened. Well it’s a long story!!!! So sit back and relax, break out the popcorn and listen.
Chapter 1
The beginning
It all started one Saturday morning, when my baby sister woke me up to read her a stack of children’s books. Normally, I would, but my friends and I were heading out to the mall. There, I found these cute pairs of jean leggings, embroidered with gemstones. I mean come on!!!!!! Wouldn’t you want a pair too? So anyway, I refused. She got mad and threw a Tantrum! Oh god!! I ran downstairs, grabbed a granola bar, and headed out the door. My friend’s mom drove us to the mall, and we had fun. While I was trying on some cute headbands, my mom calls and asks me why I didn’t read to my baby sis. So, I made up some lame excuse, and hung up. When I got home, mom looked like she would blow up! My baby sis was watching TV, while I got yelled at. I swear, she was snickering behind my back. Sometimes I feel like the mother and the youngest child have a secret connection, or alliance! So, I skipped dinner, and went to my room, where I gobbled down the rest of my leftover lasagna from the mall (I LOVE ITALIAN FOOD!!!), and lay on my bed. The pile of children’s books left on my desk, were demonically staring at me. I was studying how the books were all stacked in a weird order. Studying this order, I was imagining a wacky story involving all these storybook characters. I guess all this imagination put me into a deep sleep.
Chapter 2
Chapter 2
A Bunch of Weird People
So, that’s how this happened. See after my sleep, I woke up in a fancy room. The odd thing about this bedroom, was that the bed was 20 mattresses tall! Then it hit me! I was in, “The Princess and the pea”! I searched under the mattresses, and found the tiny dried up pea. So I threw it out the window, and plopped on the crazy bed. The next morning, the queen asked me, if I had a good sleep. So, I responded “I had a wonderful sleep! The soft mattresses made it extra cozy!” The queen had a look of dismay on her face. Immediately, she forced me out of the castle, in the middle of my toast! So I was kicked out, along with my half eaten piece of toast! Then I’d realized what I had done! I just ruined the chances of the princess becoming the prince’s wife!!! I was walking with my head down (mostly because there was a delicious turkey for breakfast, and I didn’t get to try it), when I bumped into a straw cottage. I hid behind it, and I saw a fat porky pig walking out of it. In my mind I was thinking, “MMMMM BACON!!” And, also, I knew I was in “The 3 Little Pigs” The fat pig talked with a southern accent. He seemed to be waiting for something. I leaned more over the wall, and fell plop on my face! The pig turned around and saw me! He let out a big squeal and ran, hugging his piggy butt! Of course I went in his house, and started rummaging but then, a great big loud voice sent a chill down my spine! LITTLE PIG! LITTLE PIG! LET ME COME IN! So, without thinking I came out, walked up to the big wolf and said,” I’m a human!” Then I kicked him in the shin, and ran off.
Chapter 3
Why????
As I was running, I bumped into a tree trunk, and boy did I have some splinters in my nose! I leaned over and saw 2 twins, a boy and a girl, sleeping on the roots. The girl had blonde braided hair, and the boy had dirty blonde, shaggy hair. Both were covered in filth and stains, so they were probably poor. I was in “Hansel and Gretel”! The 2 children began to awake, so I slowly tiptoed away from them. I stepped on a stick, and they saw me. I made a horrible mistake by telling them what was going to happen, and they had looks of horror on their faces! Instead of wondering down to the gingerbread house, they ran off and jumped into the creek, next to the tree. So, I seized the opportunity, and ran down to the house, and started picking at the sugar windows, and breaded walls. (Hey! After 2 hours without food, I needed to eat something!) Then a kindly old voice rang in my ears, “Nibble, nibble, little mouse. Who’s that nibbling at my house?” Oh no! I knew she was going to invite me in. So, I kicked her in the shin, and ran off, with bread in my arms. As you can see, I like kicking people. The old lady shrugged her shoulders, and went back into the delicious house. I saw the chance, and snatched some of the sugar candies from the door way. I ran and ran, and I didn’t see where I was going, so I bumped into a tall being! I found myself being carried away by a man dressed in blue, embroidered with gold. He looked like a castle guard.
Chapter 4
Chapter 4
I Become a Prisoner
Next thing, I’m being thrown into a dark stone room with a hole in the ground. I was pondering about the hole, so I peered into it. The smell was revolting. I was thinking, “Who in their right mind poops in a hole? It’s even indoors? EW! ” I sat on the stone bed, and tried to stay as far away from the poop hole, as possible. I mean, who puts defecation in the same room, you sleep? YUCK! Anyway, I heard loud footsteps coming down the stone stairs. It was a bunch of guards. They were releasing all the female prisoners. I was wondering why, but who cares? They released me! We were led to a big fancy room. A prince, in TOO MUCH gold trim, was sitting smugly in a humongous chair, or was it a throne? Anyway, he seemed to be in dismay. I almost strangled the spoiled prince, the way he lazily slouched in the chair. Sure, in the books it said he was perfect, but actually, he was a big brat! Anyway he announced in a big, old timey voice.” Hear Ye! Hear Ye! Will thou princess, that I danced with, please step forward.” Nobody stepped forward. Most of the women were dressed in oily rags. They were probably maids or poor. One of them had a huge wart, along with a snaggletooth. I could see the prince avoiding her eyes. Then, he pointed at me, and said, “You! Why are you in here? All of these prisoners are my servants.” “I don’t know! I was just walking, and these guards grabbed me!”,I complained. The prince felt sorry and let me go. I could see the maidens staring sadly at me as I left. I knew I had to release them!
Chapter 5
The Escape
I waited until midnight outside the castle, and broke in through a nearby window. I ended up in the queen’s room. I couldn’t stop myself from snickering! The queen had a green facemask, cucumber eyes, and rolled up hair. What was hilarious, was that she had her mouth open, and she was drooling all over the place. Not the queen’s finest hour. Anyway, sneaking past her was a breeze! I was tip toeing in the grand hall, and a guard saw me. I ran and kicked him. I ran even faster down the stone stairs into the dungeon. I could hear the rushed footsteps of the guards behind me. Quickly I kicked the dungeon bars and woke up everyone. I used a stone post, and was able to bust the bars. All the prisoners ran and hit the guards. They were no match to us! Quickly we flooded out the castle doors. I dived into the bushes of the nearest house I could find. Well, I guess it was a mansion. Anyway there was a dimly lit window in the attic. I took the chance and climbed to the half open window. A young maiden with beautiful blue eyes, was kneeling beside her bed, praying. “Oh, mother. When will things get better? Father still hasn’t returned from his trip! Each day, gets worse, as I hope for the best. Oh well. I will always have hope. I bid you good night! I love you!” Her words made me feel sad. I heard someone yelling “CINDERELLA!”, from downstairs. The maiden responded, and rushed downstairs. There was a big cupboard so I hid behind it, and luckily the carpet was soft so I called it a day and took my rest!
Chapter 6
I waited until midnight outside the castle, and broke in through a nearby window. I ended up in the queen’s room. I couldn’t stop myself from snickering! The queen had a green facemask, cucumber eyes, and rolled up hair. What was hilarious, was that she had her mouth open, and she was drooling all over the place. Not the queen’s finest hour. Anyway, sneaking past her was a breeze! I was tip toeing in the grand hall, and a guard saw me. I ran and kicked him. I ran even faster down the stone stairs into the dungeon. I could hear the rushed footsteps of the guards behind me. Quickly I kicked the dungeon bars and woke up everyone. I used a stone post, and was able to bust the bars. All the prisoners ran and hit the guards. They were no match to us! Quickly we flooded out the castle doors. I dived into the bushes of the nearest house I could find. Well, I guess it was a mansion. Anyway there was a dimly lit window in the attic. I took the chance and climbed to the half open window. A young maiden with beautiful blue eyes, was kneeling beside her bed, praying. “Oh, mother. When will things get better? Father still hasn’t returned from his trip! Each day, gets worse, as I hope for the best. Oh well. I will always have hope. I bid you good night! I love you!” Her words made me feel sad. I heard someone yelling “CINDERELLA!”, from downstairs. The maiden responded, and rushed downstairs. There was a big cupboard so I hid behind it, and luckily the carpet was soft so I called it a day and took my rest!
Chapter 6
A Bit Of A Problem
The next morning, I woke up and Cinderella wasn’t there. Maybe she woke up early, and went to do more chores. By now, I realized what story I was in! Anyway, the doorbell rang. I rushed downstairs (this was hard, because there were people down there), I saw the prince sitting in a chair using one of his guards as a footstool. He said, ”Please fit your foot in this glass slipper!” The fat chubby princess (Drusilla) fit her foot in the slipper. Her foot was humongous! The stepmother ordered her to step into the backroom, while the other thin as a stick sister (Anastasia) tried on the slipper. Her big toe was too large. I heard a shrill scream from the backroom, a red like substance poured out the door. It was blood. Meanwhile, Anastasia was called into the back room, as Drusilla stepped out, limping! She sat down and slid her foot on the slipper. The prince wasn’t fooled! The red blood only stained the glass! The prince pushed her aside and let Anastasia try one more time. Her whole big toe was missing, as if somebody cut it off! Then a voice perked up behind the kitchen. “May I try?’, Cinderella asked shyly. I knew what was going to happen next, so I just ran out the back door. But before escaping, I made a circle outline on the grass, with the foot of my shoe. I wanted to leave a mark. I walked down to a small beach. But I tripped on a rock, and the tide pulled me in!
The next morning, I woke up and Cinderella wasn’t there. Maybe she woke up early, and went to do more chores. By now, I realized what story I was in! Anyway, the doorbell rang. I rushed downstairs (this was hard, because there were people down there), I saw the prince sitting in a chair using one of his guards as a footstool. He said, ”Please fit your foot in this glass slipper!” The fat chubby princess (Drusilla) fit her foot in the slipper. Her foot was humongous! The stepmother ordered her to step into the backroom, while the other thin as a stick sister (Anastasia) tried on the slipper. Her big toe was too large. I heard a shrill scream from the backroom, a red like substance poured out the door. It was blood. Meanwhile, Anastasia was called into the back room, as Drusilla stepped out, limping! She sat down and slid her foot on the slipper. The prince wasn’t fooled! The red blood only stained the glass! The prince pushed her aside and let Anastasia try one more time. Her whole big toe was missing, as if somebody cut it off! Then a voice perked up behind the kitchen. “May I try?’, Cinderella asked shyly. I knew what was going to happen next, so I just ran out the back door. But before escaping, I made a circle outline on the grass, with the foot of my shoe. I wanted to leave a mark. I walked down to a small beach. But I tripped on a rock, and the tide pulled me in!
Chapter 7
Something Smells Fishy!
I woke up in a closed up space. It was very dark, I could feel the ground was squishy and soft, I went to feel the walls, but they weren’t walls at all! I realized I was in a sea anemone! I went out and there was only sea around me, fish everywhere! I saw something glistening in the distance, so I swam to it. I saw it was a pearl. Except it reflected a lionfish! It wasn’t reflecting me! Then, I lifted up my hand, and it wasn’t a hand at all! It was a fin! Just my luck! I was a lion fish. Suddenly, I heard sweet singing. I hid behind some seaweed. “I want to be, where the people are!”, sang the voice. It was coming from a mermaid with beautiful red hair, and a scaly green tail. It was “The Little Mermaid”! Accompanying her, was a red lobster, and a yellow butterfly fish. Behind her came a merman with a long silvery glowing beard. “Ariel!”, boomed his voice. “Oh father, I apologize for leaving the castle!”, said the sweet mermaid. Her father had a disappointed look, and swam away. I swam over to Ariel, and hid behind some red coral, to blend in more.” I really want to be human! My only solution, is Ursula, the underwater sea witch.”, said Ariel, hopelessly. “No you mustn’t! She will eat you!”, warned the Jamaican accented lobster. The butterfly fish swam up and down in warning, too! Ariel swam down anyway. I followed her down to the deeper waters.
I woke up in a closed up space. It was very dark, I could feel the ground was squishy and soft, I went to feel the walls, but they weren’t walls at all! I realized I was in a sea anemone! I went out and there was only sea around me, fish everywhere! I saw something glistening in the distance, so I swam to it. I saw it was a pearl. Except it reflected a lionfish! It wasn’t reflecting me! Then, I lifted up my hand, and it wasn’t a hand at all! It was a fin! Just my luck! I was a lion fish. Suddenly, I heard sweet singing. I hid behind some seaweed. “I want to be, where the people are!”, sang the voice. It was coming from a mermaid with beautiful red hair, and a scaly green tail. It was “The Little Mermaid”! Accompanying her, was a red lobster, and a yellow butterfly fish. Behind her came a merman with a long silvery glowing beard. “Ariel!”, boomed his voice. “Oh father, I apologize for leaving the castle!”, said the sweet mermaid. Her father had a disappointed look, and swam away. I swam over to Ariel, and hid behind some red coral, to blend in more.” I really want to be human! My only solution, is Ursula, the underwater sea witch.”, said Ariel, hopelessly. “No you mustn’t! She will eat you!”, warned the Jamaican accented lobster. The butterfly fish swam up and down in warning, too! Ariel swam down anyway. I followed her down to the deeper waters.
Chapter 8
A mistake
We went down to a sea moss covered villa. We went inside, and this hideous lady with purple skin, and white electrocuted hair was busy making concoctions. “Who enters my lair!”, bellowed a low, evil voice. “It is I, Ariel. I wish to be human.”, said Ariel, bravely. “Well I will be able to help you, but there is a cost.”, replied Ursula.” I need your tongue!”, she said. Ariel looked at Ursula, like she was crazy! If it meant that much for her to be a human, then she might as well give away her tongue! “Alright.”, responded Ariel. Ursula grinned with satisfaction, grabbed a crab with sharp pincers, and walked slowly to Ariel. I couldn’t bear it! “STOP!”, I yelled! I stung Ursula (Thank goodness I was a lion fish), and told Ariel what was going to happen. Ariel didn’t want to lose her life, to some human man, so she swam back to her castle, and gave her father a great big hug! King Triton thanked me, and let me stay for dinner. I forgot I was a fish, so no meat for me, but oh well, it’s the thought that counts! So, I stayed and ate seaweed. After that, I bid the family goodbye, and swam away.
We went down to a sea moss covered villa. We went inside, and this hideous lady with purple skin, and white electrocuted hair was busy making concoctions. “Who enters my lair!”, bellowed a low, evil voice. “It is I, Ariel. I wish to be human.”, said Ariel, bravely. “Well I will be able to help you, but there is a cost.”, replied Ursula.” I need your tongue!”, she said. Ariel looked at Ursula, like she was crazy! If it meant that much for her to be a human, then she might as well give away her tongue! “Alright.”, responded Ariel. Ursula grinned with satisfaction, grabbed a crab with sharp pincers, and walked slowly to Ariel. I couldn’t bear it! “STOP!”, I yelled! I stung Ursula (Thank goodness I was a lion fish), and told Ariel what was going to happen. Ariel didn’t want to lose her life, to some human man, so she swam back to her castle, and gave her father a great big hug! King Triton thanked me, and let me stay for dinner. I forgot I was a fish, so no meat for me, but oh well, it’s the thought that counts! So, I stayed and ate seaweed. After that, I bid the family goodbye, and swam away.
Chapter 9
Back to Human
By this time, I wanted to go back to human, I saw rocky stairs and tried to swim – climb up them, but that didn’t work, after about 100 more fails, I gave up. I was tired, hungry, and homesick. I wanted to go `home to my family. My mom would probably have something delicious cooked up for us. My dad probably wanted to drop a lame joke, and give me a hug. My little sister probably wanted to snuggle up close with me and chat about the world’s problems. My baby sister probably had drawn a messy picture for me! These thoughts brought me to tears. But, no fish could see them, since I was in water. I couldn’t give up. I knew I would get out eventually! I tried jumping out of the water by hoisting myself onto a big fish. That only made it grumpy. To take a break, I started rummaging around for shiny things. I saw this beautiful pearl that was golden. I looked into it, and saw myself as human! That was weird! Then I realized, I became human! But how could I know where my home was? I sat on a rock and started thinking about home again. Suddenly a bright flash appeared, and a beautiful shimmering being was floating there. The being was me, but way more goddess like! She/me asked me where I wanted to go. I replied with one word. Home. She threw a bright golden light at me, and that’s all I remember!
By this time, I wanted to go back to human, I saw rocky stairs and tried to swim – climb up them, but that didn’t work, after about 100 more fails, I gave up. I was tired, hungry, and homesick. I wanted to go `home to my family. My mom would probably have something delicious cooked up for us. My dad probably wanted to drop a lame joke, and give me a hug. My little sister probably wanted to snuggle up close with me and chat about the world’s problems. My baby sister probably had drawn a messy picture for me! These thoughts brought me to tears. But, no fish could see them, since I was in water. I couldn’t give up. I knew I would get out eventually! I tried jumping out of the water by hoisting myself onto a big fish. That only made it grumpy. To take a break, I started rummaging around for shiny things. I saw this beautiful pearl that was golden. I looked into it, and saw myself as human! That was weird! Then I realized, I became human! But how could I know where my home was? I sat on a rock and started thinking about home again. Suddenly a bright flash appeared, and a beautiful shimmering being was floating there. The being was me, but way more goddess like! She/me asked me where I wanted to go. I replied with one word. Home. She threw a bright golden light at me, and that’s all I remember!
Chapter 10
Just A Dream
I woke up, in my bed. I realized, it was all a dream! Standing beside me, was my baby sister. I grabbed her, plopped her on my lap, broke out all the storybooks, and read to her! After the books, I told my family about my dream! They all told I should write a book about it. Well that was my odyssey! A Fantastical Odyssey!
The End
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